The JEE is insanely competitive with over 12 lakh people attempting the exam. I achieved an all India Rank of 731 in JEE Advanced, 805 in JEE Main , 199 in KVPY and got through NTSE Stage 1. I will be joining IIT Kanpur this session. This post contains my reflections on the last two years of preparation for the JEE. As a prologue, I must state that things which I was uncomfortable sharing on the Internet, have been concealed from the reader.
The Rise
Flashback to the beginning of Class tenth, most of my
friends joined coaching classes to clear the highly competitive NTSE, but my
father put his foot down against joining a coaching class in Class X. His
assurance, that I could clear NTSE by preparing on my own with the help of my
tuition teachers, rung hollow in my ears.
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Me with Hrishikesh Sir, my Physics teacher and mentor. He made Physics exciting for me and helped me with the ups and downs during my preparation |
Fast forward to one month prior to the NTSE, I lost
all hope but not the craving. I knew the larger objective but someone had to
break it into doable tasks for me and that’s what Mr. Mishra (a staff at the
Centre for Advanced Technology, Indore and a NTSE prep expert) did for me. He advised
me to scan the MP Board Social Science Textbooks and mug up all the facts,
figures and dates in the book. I condensed the entire book into 32 pages of
handwritten notes in the form of fill in the blanks. I quizzed myself while
reading the notes 25-30 times in the last few days.
Ultimately, I cleared the first stage of NTSE. There
was an influx of greetings and wishes, more so because no one ever expected
that I would get through the cut-off. What people didn’t understand was that I
was just 1.5 marks over the cut-off marks! I learnt that in a competitive
exam, you don’t need to score good, but just score better. Whatever be the
case, I was enjoying the kind of recognition and acknowledgment I was getting.
I had suddenly risen to be the exemplary!
The Transition
The appreciation that I received profoundly encouraged
me to work harder for the second stage. I joined a coaching class and prepared
for the NTSE Stage 2 with their yearlong students. I understood little in the
class because what was transacted by the teachers often referred to what had
already been taught earlier in the year to them. It took me a few days to
gather the confidence to ask questions though I never became entirely
comfortable, as the giggles and mockery by the bullies in the class intimidated
me. I would complain to my dad that I couldn’t understand what was going on,
sometimes threw tantrums. But then he would ask me to be patient, face the
challenge, ask more questions.
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This is the phone that I used during the preparation period. Sacrificing a smartphone helped me improve my productivity significantly! |
Disinterestedness was bound to
come as little that was taught was understood. But I was too motivated to get
distracted. I struggled through the prep and I worked harder than I ever have
in my life, yet, I failed NTSE Stage 2.
So what went wrong? The effort, the resources and the
methodology were all in place. It was the most fundamental understanding that I
lacked, because I didn’t clear out my doubts.
Two days after NTSE Stage 2, I started my JEE preparation
classes with a strengthened resolve to not shy away from asking questions in
the class. I started asking a lot of questions in the class, some very silly
ones too. The giggles and sneer smiles told me that my teachers and my
classmates believed that I am an idiot. Despite that my teachers were patient
enough to answer all my questions. The subjects started fascinating me because
now, I could visualize and imagine what was being taught.
About a month into the JEE preparation, the first mock
test was conducted and I got a fourth rank in Indore. Everything changed after
that, the giggles and smiles disappeared. I had transited from my shy
self, who had always studied in the protected and comfortable environment of a
school into a competitive and confident individual who could survive the harsh
environment of a coaching class.
The Stimulation
Two months into the JEE prep, I started losing
interest and vigour in what I was doing. Primarily, because my hectic schedule,
which was followed with unending discipline, led to monotony in my life and
left me with little space to be random (even my recreation hours were so
fixed). Secondarily, because I felt disconnected to my ultimate goal (the JEE),
as it was too far away. It was like an abstraction for which I was working so
hard. Is the work I am doing right now going to help me two years hence? How
will I remember what I learned today, after two years? These were questions
that shook my motivation. NTSE was a sprint but JEE turned out to be a
marathon.
At this point in time, the KVPY programme (the
selection process for research colleges in India) came to me like a blessing in
disguise. The KVPY exam conducted in the mid-session of 11th
standard tests on the syllabus of both 11th and 12th
standard in all four subjects (Physics, Chemistry, Maths and Biology). With no
inclination towards research and no association with Biology, there was little
reason for me to study the entire syllabus of Classes 11th and 12th.
But the unmissable resemblance between KVPY fellows and JEE toppers motivated
me to use the KVPY as a propellant for my larger JEE prep. And hence, in a
month long prep, I worked extra hours to skim through the entire syllabus of 11th
and 12th standard in all the four subjects and got through KVPY, not
due to my depth, but width.
KVPY
gave me a realizable short term goal which motivated me to study. Achieving 199
rank in KVPY made me believe that I could put up a similar performance in the
JEE (quite falsely though as KVPY has an interview, where I was an outlier; JEE
doesn’t have interview) and stimulated me to work harder for my larger
goal. Now, my dream seemed achievable!
The Fall
Thanks to my unexpected attainment in KVPY, the
teachers and administration in my coaching started looking at me as one of
their better students and upgraded my batch. My new batch was a smaller batch
of 15 people, 12 of whom lived in the hostel where our classes were conducted,
while I lived in my home and transited to the hostel for classes. My batch change was a big shock which I could
hardly handle, for three reasons.
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Me with Kapil sir, my chemistry teacher and a lot more I entirely owe my success to my teachers |
One, class organization was extremely random as a
teacher on his convenience would call up/ cancel a class without a prior notice
(since most of the students lived in the hostel). Also, in my earlier batch, a
daily homework was given and it was discussed in the class the next day. But
here, no formal homework was given (as the students were given the flexibility
to decide what material they want to do) and no discussions were conducted in
the class. Hence, discipline and regularity in my studies ceased and
productivity touched new lows.
Two, my new teachers, though technically supreme, didn’t
try to make the subject interesting. I could hardly understand Physics now, as
my new teacher wouldn’t make me visualize the problems. Unlike the earlier
ones, Chemistry teachers weren’t humorous or witty and hence, Chemistry classes
became unbearably boring.
Three, organic and inorganic chemistry became my
nightmares. I was unable to retain the bulk of information that these subjects
contain. I was touching zeroes in these two subjects.
I was no longer involved and interested in my studies.
I would sit in my room for long hours playing with my pen, thinking of random
things. Thanks to this shock, my rank in one of the local test dropped to a new
low of 63! Getting a local rank of 63 means you are nowhere near getting into
any IIT!
Often, preparedness for JEE is checked by one’s
performance in three national exams that happen just before the JEE- the KVPY
(happens again in class 12th), the Physics Olympiad and the
Chemistry Olympiad. I flunked all the three.
It was the most stressful period of the entire two
years. I couldn’t sleep, which decreased my productivity the next day. I
started throwing tantrums at home. My dad, showing little maturity, started
fighting with me but my Mom would console me and give me hope.
I had fallen to my low just two months before
JEE Main! I was scared and I panicked.
The Comeback
The stress during the JEE prep is often condemned but
seldom acknowledged as the force that pushes you to your limits.
Due to my discouraging performance, I was so stressed
out that I took some time off my studies to reflect and introspect. I realised
that in my earlier batch, I was almost entirely driven by the system of my
coaching class and my interests in the subject (thanks to my previous teachers who
made classes interesting). And so, when the system failed and interest
withered, I couldn’t stand on my own legs. But then wasn’t JEE a test of my
abilities and not that of my circumstances?
I had started finding problems and expecting change in
my coaching class, my teachers and my parents. But was it helping my objective?
I probably didn’t have the ideal resources and circumstances
but then they were good enough. Was I doing the best that I could, given the
problems in my environment?
These three questions brought a realisation- (in
Viktor E.Frankl’s words), “When we are no longer able to change a situation
– we are challenged to change ourselves.”
And so, I made
a plan. I started giving one mock test, followed by its analysis, everyday. Since
my doubts weren’t being solved by any formal system, I derived my own
mechanism. Instead of studying at home, I started studying in a vacant room at
my coaching class. So, I sat there for 5 hours every morning and whichever
teacher would come to the premise for taking classes (of other batches), I
would ask them my doubts after/before their class.
Chemistry remained to be a thorn in my side. I
couldn’t retain the information and so, I used the technique of learning by
writing. I started rewriting the notes that I had made in the class. I
discovered that writing by hand is an amazing way of remembering and
structuring information. Organic and Inorganic Chemistry made up around 600-700
pages of classroom notes and reproducing them was a herculean task. It required
great patience and effort. But then the yield was dramatic. I started doing
well in Chemistry and that gave an unbelievable jump to my rank. This recovery
wasn’t sudden but gradual.
Should I skip the mock test today as I have had
enough? Why am I wasting so much time in copying notes while others are solving
more questions? What is the point in writing all these notes all over again?
These are all
genuine questions, with no honest answers, that arose when no observable
improvement was happening initially. They disturbed my conviction. At such
instances of self-doubt, I had to be strong enough to tell myself to keep faith
on what I was doing and not expect results immediately. The people who top
JEE aren’t those with the best approach to studying, but are those who follow
an approach for a long term, with a sustained effort.
Finally January 2019 arrived and I got a 99.93
percentile in JEE Main! I had made a comeback like never before!
The Last Lap
After JEE Main, mock tests and classes come to a halt
for a two month long break for the Class XII board examination. While I was
focussed on my boards, it was important that I don’t lose touch with the JEE
prep. In order to manage the boards, practical exams and the JEE efficiently, I
made a day by day plan of what all I am going to do on the particular days-
spelling out my JEE hours and board hours distinctively. I scored a 92.4
percent in Board with a best of four of 96.25 percent!
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I made short notes for each chapter in each subject. In two-three pages per chapter, I summed up all major concepts and formula of that chapter |
Post boards, I got a little more than a month for a
fully focussed JEE advanced prep (the second stage of JEE/entrance for the
IITs). I knew the subjects in general now, but I used this time to identify the
gaps and fill them. I gave two mock tests a day, to identify gaps and analysed
them, to fill the gaps.
I wrote 15-20
pages long analyses on every test, where for every question I did wrong, I
would write the solution I had thought of during test, encircle the mistake I
had committed and then write the correct solution. Before every mock test at my
coaching and the real JEE test, I revised all my mistakes by reviewing the
analysis of all the tests. I started remembering mistakes that I had made and
so consciously stopped committing the same mistakes again.
But more than any sort of academic furtherance, the
last month was about building an examination aptitude to not be emotionally
affected in a tough or easy test; about building stamina and patience to give a
6 hour long test in scorching summers; about building the mental strength to
perform well in all possible environmental and emotional conditions.
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I filed all my short notes. This became a wonderful tool for exhaustive and quick revision of the vast syllabus. |
And finally, the day of JEE advanced arrived. The exam
centre’s condition was pitiable with no arrangements of cooling or water and
thousands of computers throwing out hot air.
But then I recalled that JEE is a test of my ability,
not my circumstance; that I had to do my best, with all the problems in my
environment and that in a competitive exam, I don’t need to score good but just
need to score better. My last two years came back to me!
My only accomplishment is that I performed, in line
with my expectations on the exam day! It isn’t important to state that I got an
All India Rank of 731.
Looking
back at the two years, it is hard to describe the immense happiness that you get
when you work really hard for something and get very involved. Honestly, I am
no poster boy for my coaching class, and my rank is below what I had dreamt for
when I got into this prep. And yet, I am really happy because I know I was
honest to myself throughout my preparation and that is the most fulfilling
feeling!
Abhimanyu
www.abhimanyusethia.com
Abhimanyu
www.abhimanyusethia.com
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteIts very easy to see and expect a lot from a son of an IIM alumni but very difficult to perform with this liability by bypassing all such expectations humbly n respectfully. The Acceptance of who you are and how you are is the first key to proceed to bebome a better you. And undoubtedly you did it very judiously. You might not be the poster boy for any institute but u r a surely fighter, a winner and most importantly an excellent student.
ReplyDeleteIts very easy to see and expect a lot from a son of an IIM alumni but very difficult to perform with this liability by bypassing all such expectations humbly n respectfully. The Acceptance of who you are and how you are is the first key to proceed to bebome a better you. And undoubtedly you did it very judiously. You might not be the poster boy for any institute but u r a surely fighter, a winner and most importantly an excellent student.
ReplyDeleteBeside the hard work, uos and down, I must acknowledge and congratulate you for you writing skill. It's like a story that even it's quite a long but quite interesting to bind you through the end ! I won't compare you with your dad as you have your own personality. Wishing you the very best to your forward journey to become THE ABHIMANYU !
ReplyDeleteSuperb ,well explained..It will be moral boosting for aspirants
ReplyDeleteCongratulations..U did it.all the best for future
Very well written. A must read for all the kids aiming for competitive exams. Congrats Abhimanyu.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteMany Congratulations for this wonderful achievement Abhi.
ReplyDeleteAwesome summary of what all you went through and Thank you so much for putting up everything so transparently as this story of yours will surely help the aspiring students as they will be able to understand and connect quickly.
Wishing you all the very best for the future. Learn and have fun and make the most of these four years.
Congratulations once again.
Superb description of your journey Abhimanyu. I learnt so much about the exams and their preparation from your blog. It will be very helpful when my son would come to that stage of studies. All the best
ReplyDeleteVery insightful and frank talk.
ReplyDeleteNo matter what genius you are success never comes without perseverance and hardwork.
Congratulations enjoy well deserved success and Best wishes for your bright future.
Congratulations Abhimanyu, you are a star, all your hardwork, persistence, Grit , discipline paid off. Thanks for sharing the invaluable experiences for new aspirants.
ReplyDeleteAll the very best in you be journey, conquest. And you shine their as well.
This is a beginning ,Waiting for many more stories from you
ReplyDeleteVery well-written, Abhimanyu. It's a very real, honest, and brave account of your journey and that what makes it so inspiring. Often people oversimplify a success or a failure relating to eventual outcome. Very few appreciate how many failures make a success or vice versa.
ReplyDeleteThe biggest outcome of this arduous effort is not your selection but a STRONGER you
Well written Abhimanyu.
ReplyDeleteI really really like that line "JEE is a test of my abilities not my circumstances".
I interact with Jee toppers a lot and no one would have shared details like you have done. What a struggle and what a win.
Jaha humare sapne poore hote hai waha aapke struggle chalu hote hai.....XD
ReplyDeleteHey bro. Just catchin up. How you doin.
ReplyDeleteHey bro. Happy birthday. Enjoy. AND STOP DELETING COMMENTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDelete